Manly Movies

Kris Van Damme

Enemies Closer (2013)

Enemies Closer (2013)

Enemies Closer    24 Jan 2014

R 85 minReleased

5.2
IMDB: 5.2/10 538 votes

If you ever liked the teaming of Peter Hyams and Jean Claude Van Damme in TimeCop (1994) and Sudden Death (1995, review here), you’re probably going to like this movie, it’s their first re-teaming sincce 1995. Shit, did I also mention that Hyams senior directed the acutely Manly Narrow Margin (1990, review here), starring Gene ‘shut the fuck up’ Hackman? Hyams may be 70 years old, and they may not give him the budgets he used to get, ...

Kill ’em All (2017)

Kill ’em All (2017)

Kill'em All    06 Jun 2017

R 96 minReleased

5.2
IMDB: 5.2/10 351 votes

Kill ‘Em All (2017) This is one of the worst movies I’ve seen in years. Maybe one of the top five worst I’ve ever seen and God knows, I’ve watched some trash. It’s Jean Claude Van Damme’s worst movie ever, as far as I can remember right now anyway — most of his stuff this side of the 1990’s has been pretty bad to various degrees. It’s a thoroughly depressing stretch of awful. In this one, the latest DTV ...

Black Water (2018)

Black Water (2018)

Black Water    25 May 2018

R 104 minReleased

4.7
IMDB: 4.7/10 733 votes

Here is a fool writing this review, because I watched the trailer for this movie a long time ago and was quietly excited about it. The slick artwork for a VOD movie also further stewed up some promise. Those hopes faded when people started speaking about how awful the film is, but it wasn’t until I watched it myself that I realized just how bad it is. It’s the fifth team up for Jean Claude Van Damme ...